- Assy-McGee : Joan has no delfector award right now :^)
- 76
- 51
No food tastes as good as skinny 
feels, and no badge 
commands respect 
quite like the Thin badge 
does.
It's been awhile since we've taken stock 
of our gorgeous svelte kingdom, and considering the !Thin ping group 
applications have been piling up into the hundreds (full of potentially FAT people mind you) I think 
it's time we have a little 
check 
in and give some of those unproven potentially rotund r-slurs a chance to prove themselves worthy of being a part of our glorious carb-free HEAVEN.
APPLICATION 
Submit a timestamped photo 
here or to me via DMs of yourself 
(no faces) proving that you're thin. This can be a full body shot. A scale 
photo 
(with ankles showing). A wrist shot. ANY part of your body that can irrevocably show that you are thin. I will repeat - I DO NOT WANT A PHOTO 
OF YOUR FACE (that's for the Hot Badge). If you are concerned 
about PI do note that all photos submitted for the Thin badge will be visible to anyone viewing your profile when they click on your thin badge. This is done for lulz and to ensure that those you are bullying for being obese 
are sure that you are, indeed, thin and thus better than them.
Do your part to ensure that all those bullying others due to their body size is done appropriately and by the correctly sized people that deserve to bully 
others for their proportions.
Thank you!
- 124
- 153
My name is Max Azzarello, and I am an investigative researcher who has set himself on fire outside of the Trump trial in Manhattan.
This extreme act of protest is to draw attention to an urgent and important discovery:
We are victims of a totalitarian con, and our own government (along with many of their allies) is about to hit us with an apocalyptic fascist world coup.
These claims sound like fantastical conspiracy theory, but they are not. They are proof of conspiracy. If you investigate this mountain of research, you will prove them too. If you learn a great deal about Ponzi schemes, you will discover that our life is a lie. If you follow this story and the links below, you will discover the rotten truth of ‘post-truth America'. You will learn the scariest and stupidest story in world history. And you will realize that we are all in a desperate state of emergency that requires your action.
To my friends and family, witnesses and first responders, I deeply apologize for inflicting this pain upon you. But I assure you it is a drop in the bucket compared to what our government intends to inflict.
Because these words are true, this is an act of revolution.
--
Last March, a billionaire named Peter Thiel started a bank run on Silicon Valley Bank. I knew enough about Thiel that I found this incredibly suspicious: My hunch was that this was intentional, though I couldn't fathom why.
I began investigating online, and quickly found cryptocurrency's fingerprints all over it. The bank run occurred just days after Silvergate Bank – which catered almost exclusively to crypto companies – collapsed. Meanwhile, several crypto cheerleaders were all over financial media warning of a regional banking crisis, and nobody in media was addressing the clear crypto connections.
I dug deep into the financials of Thiel's venture capital firm Founders Fund and eventually uncovered the following, all proven many times over.
Cryptocurrency is our first planetary multi-trillion-dollar Ponzi scheme. It was expressly created for this purpose by a laundry list of rich and powerful people out of Stanford/Silicon Valley and Harvard/Facebook.
The March 2023 bank failures were all intentional: the banks were used to move out stolen Ponzi money. This signals that they're no longer dumping cash in to keep the cryptocurrency Ponzi afloat, and that it will soon go insolvent, as all Ponzis must.
When the Ponzi scheme goes insolvent, it will take down half the stock market with it: The perpetrators used their major companies to pipe into the blockchain so they could funnel money out from the crypto exchanges. This includes Google, Tesla, Apple, PayPal, Facebook, Disney, Walmart, Target, InBev, Zoom, and countless others.
It is a Ponzi scheme so large that it created global inflation, which is why the price of Bitcoin has been a remarkable leading indicator for inflation rates. Victims who bought crypto don't realize their money has already been stolen, so the money gets double-counted by the victims and the criminals who stole it.
As it turns out, our elites are awash in Ponzi schemes. Stanford's StartX.com investment fund and Jeffrey Epstein's ‘Program for Evolutionary Dynamics' he ran at Harvard are both fake-science Ponzi factories that these schools have invested billions in: They are filled with fraudulent companies that use smoke and mirrors to promise miraculous new technology, but always collapse while the perpetrators only get richer.
Funneling trillions of dollars in stolen cash through the stock market created the largest stock-market anomaly in history. The stock chart signature of a Ponzi scheme is a massive increase (while they stack up cash) and then a massive fall (as they funnel out the stolen cash). This chart shape appeared in all the companies listed above. In order to explain the massive anomaly, our criminal government unleashed COVID on the world and told us these were the “stay at home stocks.”
--
Ponzi schemes are vicious beasts, and cryptocurrency is history's largest Ponzi by orders of magnitude. It could best be described as an economic doomsday device, intentionally made to shatter the world economy.
The U.S. government is fully involved in this totalitarian con: To illustrate its bipartisan support, I'll note that nearly every participant of the Clinton Global Initiative has ties to cryptocurrency, while two of the biggest tech VCs who participated are Trump associates Josh Kushner and Anthony Scaramucci.
To better understand our form of government, I will point you to one of the most astonishing pieces of stand-alone evidence I've found: Arkansas Governor Bill Clinton's 1988 DNC speech where he nominated Mike Dukakis for president against George H.W. Bush. The speech is a vile, mean-spirited roast of Dukakis that makes no sense whatsoever: For Clinton to ruthlessly attack a member of his own party should have been political suicide, and he repeatedly mocks Dukakis' noble and earnest qualities.
Notably, actor Rob Lowe, who was supporting Dukakis, was victim of a teen s*x blackmail operation at the DNC that year. Since we know Clinton is a close associate with teen s*x blackmail artist Jeffrey Epstein, we can suddenly make perfect sense of the nonsensical speech by applying this lens: Bill Clinton is a cocky mob boss who blackmailed Mike Dukakis because Dukakis thought his job was to help the public. He teases out the future public revelation that Kitty Dukakis drank rubbing alcohol, and offers a strange anecdote about the crack epidemic that reveals he is an exceedingly proud drug runner.
What does this revelation tell us? That our government is conning us completely. That Bill Clinton was secretly on (former CIA Director) George H.W. Bush's side, and that the Democrat vs. Republican division has been entirely manufactured ever since: Clinton is with Bush; Gore is with Bush; Trump is with Hillary, and so on. When they present themselves in public, they are acting as characters that are against one another, practicing kayfabe as wrestlers do.
As it turns out, we have a secret kleptocracy: Both parties are run by financial criminals whose only goals are to divide, deceive, and bleed us dry. They divide the public against itself and blame the other party while everything gets worse and more expensive and handful of people take all the money.
Since it is fully parasitic, a secret kleptocracy is an incredibly unstable form of government – left to its own devices, it can only lead to fascism or failed state.
--
One of the key findings of this research is that Harvard University is one of the largest organized crime fronts in history, which is how they churn out billionaires – it's a major hub of this sprawling criminal network.
As it turns out, dozens of the writers of The Simpsons went to Harvard. So I asked myself the question: If The Simpsons served the interests of organized crime, how would it do so?
Well, it offers a dysfunctional family suffering from moral decay, a community incapable of solving its problems, a worker drone who slaves away for an evil billionaire, and cathartic laughs for our poor collective circumstances.
There are some notable specifics as it relates to this research, too: In Marge vs. The Monorail, the townsfolk are too oafish and divided to invest in the town's needs (fix Main Street) and fall for the charms of a dazzling showman with a bogus monorail Ponzi scheme. When we know that the show is closely linked to an organization that invests billions of dollars in Ponzi factories, this becomes quite darning.
In Lisa the Iconoclast, Lisa discovers that town founder Jebediah Springfield was a secret criminal con artist, and that the townsfolk's lives are a lie. Realizing this is an important discovery, she desperately tries to get the townsfolk to listen to her. But they meet her with hostility, apathy, disbelief, and partisanship and she fails to get through to them. Ultimately, she realizes the town is so far gone that perhaps it's better for them to be lied to by con artists, and she keeps the secret to herself.
And here I've been, like Lisa Simpson, desperately trying to get friends, family, and the public to believe the proof of a totalitarian con I'm trying to show them, and they've turned away with hostility, apathy, disbelief, and partisanship.
And so, we realize the criminal truth of The Simpsons: Our elites are telling us that our eroding collective circumstances are our own fault, and we can't do anything about it, while they steal the American Dream from us. It is, for lack of a more elegant word, brainwashing.
—
Lastly, we string these major discoveries together: Cryptocurrency is an economic doomsday device; our government is a secret kleptocracy; The Simpsons exists to brainwash us. From there, the only research we need is critical thinking and we're able to piece together the true story of our circumstances.
Consider America since 1988: Institutions like healthcare and universities have become parasitic in their skyrocketing prices. News media tells us to be angry and tribalized. Daytime television warns us of moral decay. Local news tell us to fear our neighbors. The Simpsons tells us we're too oafish and divided to save the American Dream. Seinfeld tells us to celebrate the buttholes and be irritated by all the normal people around us. “Reality” TV tells us that real life is filled with hedonism and strife.
Social media, owned by crypto criminals like Mark Zuckerberg and Elon Musk, is flooded with nonsense conspiracy theories and memes reminding us that we are hopeless, helpless, anxious, depressed, ironic, scared, apathetic, escapist, lonely, misguided, and jaded, telling us we can't do anything but have a laugh at our circumstances.
Liberals mock the hypocrisy of conservatives; conservatives mock the hypocrisy of liberals, and our collective circumstances erode. The left shouts “All Cops Are Bastards,” which ensures they'll be hated by the police and the public (and flies in the face of leftist theory). The public's distrust of the government is at an all-time high, but so is the belief that we are helpless to do anything about it.
And with all this, a sharp rise in apocalyptic messaging: Climate change will kill us all; COVID will kill us all; vaccines will kill us all; AI will kill us all – no matter the bubbles we ascribe to, we're bombarded with existential crises with no solutions. We've seen a surge in apocalyptic film, literature, and video games that tell us there is no way out of our poor circumstances but total societal breakdown. Zombies tell us that the public is our enemy. If you go to your nearest convenience store, you can buy a can of water called “Liquid Death.”
This is our rotten farce: For our entire lives, we have been flooded with media designed to slowly steer us into a world where the American Dream was dead, where the public was fully divided against itself, where everybody believed we were powerless to do anything about our worsening circumstances. It is all so they can organize an unprecedented, apocalyptic rug pull on the entire populace as they pivot to fascism, which is perhaps best understood as kleptocracy at the barrel of a gun.
When we piece it all together, we understand the truth: We are in a totalitarian doomsday cult.
Why on earth would our elites do this? There are many reasons, but the simplest is because capitalism is unsustainable, and they knew it: Climate change and resource extraction would catch up eventually. So, they never intended to sustain it. They knew all along that they would gobble up all the wealth they could, and then yank the rug out from under us so they could pivot to a hellish fascist dystopia.
—
Things escalated wildly in 1988 when former CIA Director George H.W. Bush got the White House, but this plan had been in action long prior:
Why is Stanley Kubrick's comedy about mutually assured destruction called Dr. Strangelove: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb? Because he was a cocky secret fascist who was getting us to stop worrying and love the bomb. Why did he make A Clockwork Orange? So we'd rejoice at ultra-violence designed to desensitize us to the horrors of the world.
Why were the Manson Family murders crawling with cover-ups and intelligence agents? Because our government wanted to make us fear for our lives and believe that hippies are deranged psychopaths.
Why did Walt Disney produce a fraudulent documentary that told us Lemmings follow each other off cliffs? So we would believe it.
Why did The Beatles tell us to fear the taxman, to scoff at revolution, chase nonsense conspiracy theories, and that happiness is a warm gun? So we would believe it.
Why did Easy Rider tell us that the hippie movement was dead? So we would believe it.
Why did Chinatown end with defeatism in the face of massive corruption? So we would believe it.
Why did George Orwell tell us of a hellish future of totalitarian control that we are powerless to stop? So we would believe it.
Why did Wall Street tell us “greed is good”? So we would believe it.
Why did Do The Right Thing tell us we're all racially tribalized? So we would believe it.
Why did Simpsons creator Matt Groening make a comic strip called Life in Heck? So we would believe it.
And on, and on, and on, and on. When it comes to any popular media, if you ask yourself the question, “Why would secret doomsday cult kleptocrats want the public to consume this?”, you will find your answers.
—
This is obviously very bad news, but the biggest lie we've been told is that we are powerless. We've got one way out of hellworld, and that's for the public to realize that we've been conned completely so we can build a united movement that shatters every lie they've told us, mocks this rotten farce as loudly as it deserves, and aims at nothing short of abolishing our criminal government so we can build one that serves the public.
To understand this story is to see right through the con, to become immune to the endless sea of criminal propaganda, and to feel the great joy and power that comes with freedom.
If a small number of people quickly put on these truth-colored glasses, we are in for an unimaginably bright future. If not, we get an apocalypse.
For more information, I've put together this booklet that includes other major findings and a map to a sea of proof, along with all the other essays on this site.
For the true history of America since the end of World War II, see here.
To see this discovery unfold in real-time, along with further explanations, hundreds of pieces of evidence not covered here, advice, inspiration, political theory, and the heart and soul of a man escaping history's largest doomsday cult, see my Instagram story highlights. I apologize for leaving things so scattered, but this has been an exhausting affair. So long as you understand this (true) ideology, you will be able to learn the whole story.
Here is a federal lawsuit I filed against dozens of perpetrators of the cryptocurrency Ponzi – not for litigation, but just to preserve the information and attach my name to it. I was terrified and hadn't slept in days and it shows, but it served its purpose of keeping myself alive long enough to keep learning and telling this story.
I no longer have my original research files from the crypto rabbit hole. If you want to see them, you'll have to get my laptop back from the government. Ask them how they got it - it's a very fun story.
I hope you know how powerful you are. I wish you a heck of a lot more than luck.
Max Azzarello
He also had a reddit account and posted on stupidpol
He posted on a ton of conspiratard subs like epstein and the rconspiracy one
posted on /r/peepee (lao)
also posted on okbuddycinephile
mostly political subs like rpolitics stupidpol latestagecapitalism
EDIT:
turns out hes an anarcho communist who believed in "leftist unity"
https://twitter.com/reddit_lies/status/1781401076798734663
linked in:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/maxazzarello
also schizomaxxing evern more
https://twitter.com/ShaykhSulaiman/status/1781399035015815366
EDIT:
HOL UP 
https://twitter.com/StrongTowns/status/821388886660313088 IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS
I THINK THIS IS HIS TWITTER
https://twitter.com/MathewMCrosby1/with_replies
EDIT EDIT: 4 DAYS BEFORE TODAY APRIL 19TH SOME OF HIS PAMPHLETS WENT VIRAL ON TWITTER
https://twitter.com/alexbronzini/status/1779916608548257880
EDIT: THIS IS DEFINITELY HIS TWITTER I FOUND IT FR
- 19
- 50
on loving phil 9:32
some probably related phil musings on his /u/10000cats100dogs account
Jinxthinker wanted to tell Phil that he loves him. He had a dream about DSP yesterday. He is sexually attracted to phil.
Jinxthinker had a fancy of making friends and streaming on Twitch again, but then was like "frick that shit".
Talks about dedicating his life to DSP 0:30
Has run out of drinks and candy
Phil needs to be known as that BIPOC who plays real games by playing RPG (but not homo AIDS ones like Final Fantasy)
pedorama is always going on about free healthcare because they all have HIV 2:00
Jinxthinker and Phil are both pure Aryans who were rejected so they can say FRICK YOU
jinxthinker has been wanking to a formerly emo e-girl. He could easily regress his mind and mindlessly wank to children but he won't. 3:30
Tattoos should be mandatory when women turn 18
He wants to see DSP break someone's orbital bone in the octagon 4:45
DSP would have been in the Pinkerton's detective agency saying "frick you working class people"
Mr. P-dophile man called out as having a small peepee and not being white 7:00
@Aevann mentioned
We look at DSP's instagram and lust over DSP's wife
DSP and Jinxthinker will rule over the earth as King and King and make the working class suffer
!jinxthinkers have you rethought your choice to be a homosexual who wants free healthcare?
[Event] [Carbinye Carnyivwl #1] WOWLCWOW searching cwompetition. FtM edition. 
[PRIZE INSIDE]
- 28
- 48
Hey fwiends. 
In accwordance with my 2 year accwount birthgay i'm hwosting a littwal cwompetition. Mwe and swome other dwamatards had fun wooking thwough the Wowlcwow /u/gaygender, a cwazy t4t pwoonyer, swome tim back but I think it's a shame we've onwy fwound onye gwood wowlcwow. That's why I'm recwuiting u two search the depths of /r/ftm and related subs two fwind us (me) the best, yet unknyown, pwoonyer cwow out there! Ideawwy submission shwould have pics. Bwonyus pwoints if u bait them ywourself. 
A few exampwes of /u/gaygender -
https://rdrama.net/h/fatpeoplehate/post/251852/keeping-a-tpeepee-clean-as-a
https://rdrama.net/h/meta/post/251866/me-on-the-left-nonbinary-theythem
https://rdrama.net/post/251850/me-and-my-sos-mtf-transphobic
Pwizes are as fwowwows :
1st - 10k DC/MB
2rd - a GWOATSE in ywour DMs
I'd perswonyawwy suggest searching on /r/ftmfeminity as I've fwound swome gems there like these handswome fewwas 
or this hilarious whwore https://old.reddit.com/user/beariesandcream
U wiww submit ywour wowlcwows, ideawwy with pictures in this thwead and I'ww dwo a fwowwow up voting thwead in 4 days. Nyow get out there, and milk swome cwows. 
trans lives matter
- 82
- 50
So Civil War came out and it's.... leh bad????? Let's discuss
So basically the story is set in some alternate universe where there's a civil war in America. One thing that's missing all throughout the movie is any grounding in reality that would make the movie make sense. They essentially play it straight with as close to realism as possible so it makes everything else around the movie all that much less possible to take seriously.
Here's the map that supposedly the current geopolitical situation in the movie.
Blue = Loyalist States
Green = Western Forces
Red = Florida Alliance
Yellow = New Peoples Army (you never see these guys in the movie)
So already we're off to a bad start. How's the WF going to supply each other? Expensive butt planes? Also what's to keep these state borders to begin with? Why haven't people just drawn borders of their own? You'll notice that as you ask more question the stupider the movie gets.
Also of note is the curious absence of any... cause? There's no indication of WHAT the states are fighting over? There's a sniper (males) later on in the film that has painted nails in the trans colors so I'm just going to go ahead and assume the civil war is being fought over trans right 
Which side would you be on in the battle for trans right dramatards? I would be fighting with my inverted peepee xrothers and xisters in the trenches to defend my fellow tranners, I'll have you know.
TRANS LIVE MATTER!!!!
This movie is essentially a shitlib suburban wine mom's version of what they think Drumphler would inact upon the united states of the brave pink vagina hat mommies and dommies didn't boot his butt out of office.
PLOT
Anyway the movie starts with Ron Swanson doing his best Donald Trump impression - Nick Offerman is a frequent and heavy consumer of Trump Derangement Syndrome and I'm sure relished in the idea of taking on a Trump-esque roll to lampoon him, even though you see him for about 2 mins at the beginning of the movie and 30 seconds at the end and that's it. A24 must have been running the budget tight.
Some kid goes up to Gwenyth Paltrow at some protest where a bomb goes and goes uwu you're my hero you have the same name as (something something plot contrivance to get the two to meet). Gwenyth is using a FILM CAMERA which for some reason they think in the 21st century film cameras and not just any dope with a working phone are relevant to the 
"journ*listic profession" (I vomited typing that)
Cut to the hotel they're staying it and fatso old man (Stephen McKinley Henderson) is there along with Gwenyth and Joe (who's real name is Joel but his horrible accent and basically unintelligible dialogue made me believe until just now looking up the IMDB page right now that his name is Joe). Their big master plan is that they want to drive from NY to DC (where they allegedly "shoot journ*lists on sight," god I wish) and interview the president because he hasn't given an interview in over 18 months. The young chick is there and introduces herself as Jessie (which I misheard as Dussie so that's what we're gonna go ahead and call her for the rest of this review, you know I'm starting to think that I have a problem hearing things...). Gwenyth the following morning - expressing zero emotion throughout the entire movie except monotone 
line delivery - states verbally her annoyance at having a rookie come to the trip. Fatso is there too and even though he's established as their journ*listic competition (lol, lmao even) they agree to give him a ride to DC. Sure why not.
This is the basic structure they use to string together a rollercoaster of events essentially.
Weeeee!!!!
The gas station
They stop at a gas station even though they're not empty (and they have an extra container on the back which the director forgot about) because you "have to get gas at any opportunity you can." Uh okay. The gas station is ran by a bunch of good ol' proud boys with their modded AR-15s and big beards and body armor and they're sitting close enough to each other that one spray from an automatic rifle would kill all of them pretty quickly but nevertheless they ask Maggie Gylenhaal for her "fueling license" 
. She says she can pay them in cash, and offers 300 dollars. And they're like 300 ain't buy you much, that'll get you like a sandwich (okay but like a sandwich's worth of gas is a pretty decent amount of gas tho....) and then Gwenyth goes - no no CANADIAN.
We have entered into a bizarro land where Canadian dollars are worth more than the USD. How would the Canucks not get immediately captured the moment that war broke out. What are they gonna call on the powerful and mighty 21st century English navy to help them out? Oh hey fellow Americans I know we're all having a civil war and whatnot but the english are here, you guys just stand far enough away from each other so we can't shoot ourselves and we can easily take care of this problem.
Good ol' boy agrees and they get fuel. Young chick sees some looters strung up and gets too scared to take photos because it's the first time she's seen gore (she should go to WPD some more, causal 
)
war is le hecko
The movie then does these long cinematic shots of - what I can only assume should be - war torn neighborhoods. But it doesn't look.... that bad? 
Here's some examples I was able to pull from the trailer.
Like the bright color pallates, most of the skyscrapers are still standing, the bridges are in working order. In the movie the asphalt is in good shape, the paint on the road is nice and crisp. This is supposed to be horrible scenery and yet it looks... fine? Except for the smoke and the preepmtively blown up car in the second and fourth images respectively. Is American really embroiled in the aesthetics of a horrific civil war or is it just Cincinnati?
By comparison, here's an actual war torn country, Ukraine
Western Forces
So lemme make sure I understand this properly. You're telling me DC decided to pick a fight with the state that produces like 70% of all the food IN THE NATION and also still has EXTRA to export to other countries and the state that has a shit load of manufacturing and a huge gun culture? Again... why? They never say the cause but I'm morbidly curious to know what would cause DC to do this.
shoot shoot, bleed bleed
The next day they follow around some florida militia boys as they smoke some camo boys - not sure who's on who's side but I just guessed cause the florida boys are wearing very visible red hawaiian shirts. They witness a guy get shot and get dragged to safety after which they see a medic packing medical gauze into the wound to prevent further bleeding (I'm making a point of this because it will become important later).
They SEE and WITNESS this happening and even PHOTOGRAPH this happening in front of them so there's no excuse NOT TO KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN SOMEONE GETS SHOT OKAY????
They also do that tacticool thing where they have all the soldiers go like "STACK UP, ON ME!! 
" which is really dumb and adds nothing to the movie. I discovered a cool thing which is that the US military will let you use their toys if the script gets approved by the DoD - which it definitely looks like it did here.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military%E2%80%93entertainment_complex
So I'm guessing that's what's happening here, they got a bunch of good ol' boys from the Army to reenact a bunch of CQB for the camera because there's a lot of that (and more towards the end too) which adds nothing to the plot and isn't even that cool to look at. They work their way up some stairs a smoke a guy who was groaning in pain and not even armed, lmao. Then they execute a bunch of people wearing those Abu Dhabi black hoods. Fun and wholesome for the whole family 
if the movie didn't try to moralize it like it's le bad. Everyone knows war is heck, the more compelling thing is what it does to the human psyche which this movie explores with the subtlety of a howitzer cannon.
They start driving and come upon an idillyc neighborhood where all the signs of war are absent. "Are we in some type of time machine" remarks Joe. They walk into one of the stores and say to the shopkeeper - "Hey you know there's a pretty big civil war going around 
" and the shopkeeper is like "yeah we like to stay out of it 
" to which Joe scoffs as if to say yeah right chud, don't you understand that centrism is nazis!??!?!?!?!?!?!
drumphler wants to kill women and minorities and turn Amerikkka into a fascist state!! Silence is violence!!! TWO SCOOPS!!!!! 
They decide to take some time to relax. Angelina Jolie tries on a dress and Dussie photographs her. Joe puts on a silly hat
Ummm excuse me chud, why are you wasting your time trying on hats, don't you know there's like a pretty big civil war going around AND PUTLER IS KILLING RGB AND TURNING AMERICA INTO THE HANDMADE TABLE!!!
winter winter wonderland
Anyway the crew continue driving north until they come upon a winter wonderland outdoors display (it's summer). In the middle of the road is the dead body of a soldier with still fresh blood on them. Joe decides - despite the evidence in front of him that he's going to get shot - to move the car slowly forward, at which point he gets shot Don't worry though he's fine and they panic accelerate running over the body which is a cheap shitty prosthetic and it doesn't look convincingly like a body at all. Honestly this made me laugh very hard. There's a sniper in the neighboring building that's shooting at them and as they're taking cover they find the counter snipers - one spotter another sniper. Joe's all like "who are you fighting for" and the spotter sniper calls him r-slurred 
and says there's a guy in the tower, he's trying to kill us, we're trying to kill him. Honestly I love these guys were it not for the fact that they were wearing ghillie suits, bleached blond hair (that would be very easy to spot from a distance) and painted nails (they're both dudes) that are painted in the trans pink blue colors. This is never explained why they look so bizarre. They shoot the other guy and then the gang moves on its way.
As they're driving another car comes up and it turns out it's one of Joes WaAaAcKy friends who's like totally crazy and he jumps out of his car into theirs and Dussie does the same in reverse. The driver of the other car speeds off and then they get worried when they see the car abandoned later on down the road. Turns out some redneck hick (Jesse Plemmons) took them hostage and he's dumping out a truckload of bodies into a mass grave. How did he kill these people? Why? Is he just a checkpoint? What's his motivation? No one knows. They come up and try to reason with him and and he starts asking where are you from and they all say some state and then one of Joes friends goes "Hong Kong" LMAAAOOOOO what. Dude just lie what's wrong with you. It's never explained but Jesse's character is supposed to be xenophobic but like... you never see a line that's like
He just very calmly asks each person where they're from and shoots them if they don't give a satisfactory answer? So weird. Where his xenophobia comes from is never explained and the old fatso fatty fat fat rams the car into him (despite them being in an open field and having guns and also you can very much hear a car that's about to run you over even if your back was turned to it, but okay go off queen) killing Jesse and stunning his friend but knocking the gun out of his hand. They all climb in and drive off while his friend is shooting at the car. They're shooting from behind the car and despite this the person in the back seat DIDN'T get hit, but fatso fatty fat (driver) DID get hit (in one of his many engorged arteries I persume) and starts to bleed out slowly.
OH GOD OH SHIT OH FRICK WHAT DO WE DO!!!!
Okay journo tards. There's three of you in the car so I presume you have a minimum of three brain cells to work together here. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN SOMEONE IS BLEEDING????
...
C'MON I KNOW YOU HAVE SEEN PEOPLE GET SHOT BEFORE. CAN YOU THINK OF WHAT TO DO WHEN THERE'S BLOOD GUSHING OUT OF A WOUND???
YOU HAVE SEEN THIS EXACT SITUATION HAPPEN BEFORE. IN THIS VERY MOVIE. YOU EVEN PHOTOGRAPHED IT!!! FOR GOD'S SAKE WHAT THE FRICK DO YOU DO?!?!?!?!?!?
The journotards - realistically depicting the lack of analytical thinking and sub-chimpanzee problem solveing skills that they have in the actual real world - do nothing except sneed 
and cope 
about how their friend is gonna die and there's nothing they can do EVEN THOUGH THERE'S DEFINITELY MANY MANY DIFFERENT THINGS THEY COULD HAVE DONE TO PROLONG HIS LIFE UNTIL THEY REACH A HOSPITAL but alas there's nothing they can do. The next 15 mins is just wallowing around about how sad it is that my friend died a very preventable death that I did nothing to stop because I'm a fricking useless idiot. Then they get word that the Western Forces are gonna storm DC and take the white house (while wearing the pink kitty hats I'm guessing)
DID THEY HAVE NOTHING IN THE CAR, NO FIRST AID KIT???? THEY'RE WAR REPORTERS!!!!!!!!!! I'M STILL MAD ABOUT THIS 
RRRAAHHHHH!!! WAAAARRRRRRR!!!!!
They enter the last third of the movie which is.... ooh boy. Bad. It's bad. Lot of shit is happening so I won't be able to do a play by play but I'll list my favorite and silliest scenarios that took place.
They have two humvees driving around a corner trying to take down a pill box. The journos are so close that they're touching one of the humvees and also the soldiers in front of them. From the perspective of a commanding officer it looks absolutely ridiculous. One of the humvees allows a missle to take it down, which is weird since it should have been laying down covering fire?
A helicopter hovers super low (like 20 ft off the ground) and fires from its miniguns into... nothing? Very few enemy combatants are shown. Fun fact about helicopters if you stuck a piece of tape on top of one of its propellers, it would decentralize it's gyroscopic mechanisms so much that it would fail to take off!
Also another fun fact about helicopters, they can be taken down with small arms fire, WHICH IS WHY THEY NEVER GET TO ANYWHERE NEAR 20 FEET OFF THE GROUND UNLESS THEY'RE PICKING SOMETHING UP, ESPECIALLY NOT IN DANGER CLOSE HOT ZONES LIKE THIS ONE. A LITERAL PISTOL COULD HAVE TAKEN IT DOWN A HUNDRED MILLION DOLLAR HELICOPTER.They have scene of a tank smashing through a barricade that - while all the other tanks look like modern day abrams - looks like it's from the 1960s. Movie director must not have been very popular with the DoD guy he was assigned lol.
A presidential van tries to make a run for it and stupidly smashes itself into a bunch of humvees and shit. The people inside (not president) try to come out with their hands up and are shot on sight. Maggie Gylenhaal has a hunch that the president isn't in there and heads into the white house. The troops show up and despite not knowing they were in there, DO NOT SHOOT THE JOURN*LISTS ON SIGHT even though they are pretty trigger happy but okay. They're following the fighting inside the white house and taking pictures and are extremely danger close. I honestly doubt they would have let war reporters literally breathe down their necks while they're reloading. Anyway due to some plot contrivance Dussie is in the middle of a hallway and is about to get shot but Maggie pushes her out of the way and gets shot herself. Then they go up to the white house press secretary which is like "please let us negotiate safe release and passage to some other state" and one of the grunts is like "I will never agree to that deal" and shoots her which is weird because why would some expendable grunt have ANY negotiating power? And also wouldn't key cabinet members as well as the president themselves be good to keep alive so you can execute them publicly as a show of force? I tell you these guys do NOT get coups man. They find Ron Swanson, give him some last words and then shoot him in the head. Then the movie ends with everyone next to the body like they're photographic a fish (I kinda like this shot tho, lol)
ANNOYANCES
They have a strange amount of jumpscares where they'll be like periods of quite and all of the sudden there'll be loud gunfire? And it won't really coincide with the plot - which is to say it's not relevant at that moment more so than at any other point in the movie. It's just bad and it scared me
tropes tropes and more tropes
stack up on me!
ah I'm shot but it's okay it's only a little bleeding
how stupid everything is
Anyway this movie was dumb and luckily you don't have to watch it because you read my review! Yayyyyyyyy :)
- 2
- 5
!actualbiofoids !pinggrouplovers !male feminists @Ping-Krazy
@GAY_FOR_DWHITE_DYNAMITE
@The_Ghost_Poster
@Ping_Hazy_the_2nd
So Civil War came out and it's.... leh bad????? Let's discuss
So basically the story is set in some alternate universe where there's a civil war in America. One thing that's missing all throughout the movie is any grounding in reality that would make the movie make sense. They essentially play it straight with as close to realism as possible so it makes everything else around the movie all that much less possible to take seriously.
Here's the map that supposedly the current geopolitical situation in the movie.
Blue = Loyalist States
Green = Western Forces
Red = Florida Alliance
Yellow = New Peoples Army (you never see these guys in the movie)
So already we're off to a bad start. How's the WF going to supply each other? Expensive butt planes? Also what's to keep these state borders to begin with? Why haven't people just drawn borders of their own? You'll notice that as you ask more question the stupider the movie gets.
Also of note is the curious absence of any... cause? There's no indication of WHAT the states are fighting over? There's a sniper (males) later on in the film that has painted nails in the trans colors so I'm just going to go ahead and assume the civil war is being fought over trans right Which side would you be on in the battle for trans right dramatards? I would be fighting with my inverted peepee xrothers and xisters in the trenches to defend my fellow tranners, I'll have you know.
TRANS LIVE MATTER!!!!
This movie is essentially a shitlib suburban wine mom's version of what they think Drumphler would inact upon the united states of the brave pink vagina hat mommies and dommies didn't boot his butt out of office.
PLOT
Anyway the movie starts with Ron Swanson doing his best Donald Trump impression - Nick Offerman is a frequent and heavy consumer of Trump Derangement Syndrome and I'm sure relished in the idea of taking on a Trump-esque roll to lampoon him, even though you see him for about 2 mins at the beginning of the movie and 30 seconds at the end and that's it. A24 must have been running the budget tight.
Some kid goes up to Gwenyth Paltrow at some protest where a bomb goes and goes uwu you're my hero you have the same name as (something something plot contrivance to get the two to meet). Gwenyth is using a FILM CAMERA which for some reason they think in the 21st century film cameras and not just any dope with a working phone are relevant to the "journ*listic profession" (I vomited typing that)
Cut to the hotel they're staying it and fatso old man (Stephen McKinley Henderson) is there along with Gwenyth and Joe (who's real name is Joel but his horrible accent and basically unintelligible dialogue made me believe until just now looking up the IMDB page right now that his name is Joe). Their big master plan is that they want to drive from NY to DC (where they allegedly "shoot journ*lists on sight," god I wish) and interview the president because he hasn't given an interview in over 18 months. The young chick is there and introduces herself as Jessie (which I misheard as Dussie so that's what we're gonna go ahead and call her for the rest of this review, you know I'm starting to think that I have a problem hearing things...). Gwenyth the following morning - expressing zero emotion throughout the entire movie except monotone line delivery - states verbally her annoyance at having a rookie come to the trip. Fatso is there too and even though he's established as their journ*listic competition (lol, lmao even) they agree to give him a ride to DC. Sure why not.
This is the basic structure they use to string together a rollercoaster of events essentially.
Weeeee!!!!
The gas station
They stop at a gas station even though they're not empty (and they have an extra container on the back which the director forgot about) because you "have to get gas at any opportunity you can." Uh okay. The gas station is ran by a bunch of good ol' proud boys with their modded AR-15s and big beards and body armor and they're sitting close enough to each other that one spray from an automatic rifle would kill all of them pretty quickly but nevertheless they ask Maggie Gylenhaal for her "fueling license" . She says she can pay them in cash, and offers 300 dollars. And they're like 300 ain't buy you much, that'll get you like a sandwich (okay but like a sandwich's worth of gas is a pretty decent amount of gas tho....) and then Gwenyth goes - no no CANADIAN.
We have entered into a bizarro land where Canadian dollars are worth more than the USD. How would the Canucks not get immediately captured the moment that war broke out. What are they gonna call on the powerful and mighty 21st century English navy to help them out? Oh hey fellow Americans I know we're all having a civil war and whatnot but the english are here, you guys just stand far enough away from each other so we can't shoot ourselves and we can easily take care of this problem.
Good ol' boy agrees and they get fuel. Young chick sees some looters strung up and gets too scared to take photos because it's the first time she's seen gore (she should go to WPD some more, causal )
war is le hecko
The movie then does these long cinematic shots of - what I can only assume should be - war torn neighborhoods. But it doesn't look.... that bad?
Here's some examples I was able to pull from the trailer.
Like the bright color pallates, most of the skyscrapers are still standing, the bridges are in working order. In the movie the asphalt is in good shape, the paint on the road is nice and crisp. This is supposed to be horrible scenery and yet it looks... fine? Except for the smoke and the preepmtively blown up car in the second and fourth images respectively. Is American really embroiled in the aesthetics of a horrific civil war or is it just Cincinnati?
By comparison, here's an actual war torn country, Ukraine
Western Forces
So lemme make sure I understand this properly. You're telling me DC decided to pick a fight with the state that produces like 70% of all the food IN THE NATION and also still has EXTRA to export to other countries and the state that has a shit load of manufacturing and a huge gun culture? Again... why? They never say the cause but I'm morbidly curious to know what would cause DC to do this.
shoot shoot, bleed bleed
The next day they follow around some florida militia boys as they smoke some camo boys - not sure who's on who's side but I just guessed cause the florida boys are wearing very visible red hawaiian shirts. They witness a guy get shot and get dragged to safety after which they see a medic packing medical gauze into the wound to prevent further bleeding (I'm making a point of this because it will become important later).
They SEE and WITNESS this happening and even PHOTOGRAPH this happening in front of them so there's no excuse NOT TO KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN SOMEONE GETS SHOT OKAY????
They also do that tacticool thing where they have all the soldiers go like "STACK UP, ON ME!! " which is really dumb and adds nothing to the movie. I discovered a cool thing which is that the US military will let you use their toys if the script gets approved by the DoD - which it definitely looks like it did here.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military%E2%80%93entertainment_complex
So I'm guessing that's what's happening here, they got a bunch of good ol' boys from the Army to reenact a bunch of CQB for the camera because there's a lot of that (and more towards the end too) which adds nothing to the plot and isn't even that cool to look at. They work their way up some stairs a smoke a guy who was groaning in pain and not even armed, lmao. Then they execute a bunch of people wearing those Abu Dhabi black hoods. Fun and wholesome for the whole family if the movie didn't try to moralize it like it's le bad. Everyone knows war is heck, the more compelling thing is what it does to the human psyche which this movie explores with the subtlety of a howitzer cannon.
They start driving and come upon an idillyc neighborhood where all the signs of war are absent. "Are we in some type of time machine" remarks Joe. They walk into one of the stores and say to the shopkeeper - "Hey you know there's a pretty big civil war going around " and the shopkeeper is like "yeah we like to stay out of it " to which Joe scoffs as if to say yeah right chud, don't you understand that centrism is nazis!??!?!?!?!?!?!
drumphler wants to kill women and minorities and turn Amerikkka into a fascist state!! Silence is violence!!! TWO SCOOPS!!!!!
They decide to take some time to relax. Angelina Jolie tries on a dress and Dussie photographs her. Joe puts on a silly hat
Ummm excuse me chud, why are you wasting your time trying on hats, don't you know there's like a pretty big civil war going around AND PUTLER IS KILLING RGB AND TURNING AMERICA INTO THE HANDMADE TABLE!!!
winter winter wonderland
Anyway the crew continue driving north until they come upon a winter wonderland outdoors display (it's summer). In the middle of the road is the dead body of a soldier with still fresh blood on them. Joe decides - despite the evidence in front of him that he's going to get shot - to move the car slowly forward, at which point he gets shot Don't worry though he's fine and they panic accelerate running over the body which is a cheap shitty prosthetic and it doesn't look convincingly like a body at all. Honestly this made me laugh very hard. There's a sniper in the neighboring building that's shooting at them and as they're taking cover they find the counter snipers - one spotter another sniper. Joe's all like "who are you fighting for" and the spotter sniper calls him r-slurred and says there's a guy in the tower, he's trying to kill us, we're trying to kill him. Honestly I love these guys were it not for the fact that they were wearing ghillie suits, bleached blond hair (that would be very easy to spot from a distance) and painted nails (they're both dudes) that are painted in the trans pink blue colors. This is never explained why they look so bizarre. They shoot the other guy and then the gang moves on its way.
As they're driving another car comes up and it turns out it's one of Joes WaAaAcKy friends who's like totally crazy and he jumps out of his car into theirs and Dussie does the same in reverse. The driver of the other car speeds off and then they get worried when they see the car abandoned later on down the road. Turns out some redneck hick (Jesse Plemmons) took them hostage and he's dumping out a truckload of bodies into a mass grave. How did he kill these people? Why? Is he just a checkpoint? What's his motivation? No one knows. They come up and try to reason with him and and he starts asking where are you from and they all say some state and then one of Joes friends goes "Hong Kong" LMAAAOOOOO what. Dude just lie what's wrong with you. It's never explained but Jesse's character is supposed to be xenophobic but like... you never see a line that's like
He just very calmly asks each person where they're from and shoots them if they don't give a satisfactory answer? So weird. Where his xenophobia comes from is never explained and the old fatso fatty fat fat rams the car into him (despite them being in an open field and having guns and also you can very much hear a car that's about to run you over even if your back was turned to it, but okay go off queen) killing Jesse and stunning his friend but knocking the gun out of his hand. They all climb in and drive off while his friend is shooting at the car. They're shooting from behind the car and despite this the person in the back seat DIDN'T get hit, but fatso fatty fat (driver) DID get hit (in one of his many engorged arteries I persume) and starts to bleed out slowly.
OH GOD OH SHIT OH FRICK WHAT DO WE DO!!!!
Okay journo tards. There's three of you in the car so I presume you have a minimum of three brain cells to work together here. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN SOMEONE IS BLEEDING????
...
C'MON I KNOW YOU HAVE SEEN PEOPLE GET SHOT BEFORE. CAN YOU THINK OF WHAT TO DO WHEN THERE'S BLOOD GUSHING OUT OF A WOUND???
YOU HAVE SEEN THIS EXACT SITUATION HAPPEN BEFORE. IN THIS VERY MOVIE. YOU EVEN PHOTOGRAPHED IT!!! FOR GOD'S SAKE WHAT THE FRICK DO YOU DO?!?!?!?!?!?
The journotards - realistically depicting the lack of analytical thinking and sub-chimpanzee problem solveing skills that they have in the actual real world - do nothing except sneed and cope about how their friend is gonna die and there's nothing they can do EVEN THOUGH THERE'S DEFINITELY MANY MANY DIFFERENT THINGS THEY COULD HAVE DONE TO PROLONG HIS LIFE UNTIL THEY REACH A HOSPITAL but alas there's nothing they can do. The next 15 mins is just wallowing around about how sad it is that my friend died a very preventable death that I did nothing to stop because I'm a fricking useless idiot. Then they get word that the Western Forces are gonna storm DC and take the white house (while wearing the pink kitty hats I'm guessing)
DID THEY HAVE NOTHING IN THE CAR, NO FIRST AID KIT???? THEY'RE WAR REPORTERS!!!!!!!!!! I'M STILL MAD ABOUT THIS
RRRAAHHHHH!!! WAAAARRRRRRR!!!!!
They enter the last third of the movie which is.... ooh boy. Bad. It's bad. Lot of shit is happening so I won't be able to do a play by play but I'll list my favorite and silliest scenarios that took place.
They have two humvees driving around a corner trying to take down a pill box. The journos are so close that they're touching one of the humvees and also the soldiers in front of them. From the perspective of a commanding officer it looks absolutely ridiculous. One of the humvees allows a missle to take it down, which is weird since it should have been laying down covering fire?
A helicopter hovers super low (like 20 ft off the ground) and fires from its miniguns into... nothing? Very few enemy combatants are shown. Fun fact about helicopters if you stuck a piece of tape on top of one of its propellers, it would decentralize it's gyroscopic mechanisms so much that it would fail to take off!
Also another fun fact about helicopters, they can be taken down with small arms fire, WHICH IS WHY THEY NEVER GET TO ANYWHERE NEAR 20 FEET OFF THE GROUND UNLESS THEY'RE PICKING SOMETHING UP, ESPECIALLY NOT IN DANGER CLOSE HOT ZONES LIKE THIS ONE. A LITERAL PISTOL COULD HAVE TAKEN IT DOWN A HUNDRED MILLION DOLLAR HELICOPTER.They have scene of a tank smashing through a barricade that - while all the other tanks look like modern day abrams - looks like it's from the 1960s. Movie director must not have been very popular with the DoD guy he was assigned lol.
A presidential van tries to make a run for it and stupidly smashes itself into a bunch of humvees and shit. The people inside (not president) try to come out with their hands up and are shot on sight. Maggie Gylenhaal has a hunch that the president isn't in there and heads into the white house. The troops show up and despite not knowing they were in there, DO NOT SHOOT THE JOURN*LISTS ON SIGHT even though they are pretty trigger happy but okay. They're following the fighting inside the white house and taking pictures and are extremely danger close. I honestly doubt they would have let war reporters literally breathe down their necks while they're reloading. Anyway due to some plot contrivance Dussie is in the middle of a hallway and is about to get shot but Maggie pushes her out of the way and gets shot herself. Then they go up to the white house press secretary which is like "please let us negotiate safe release and passage to some other state" and one of the grunts is like "I will never agree to that deal" and shoots her which is weird because why would some expendable grunt have ANY negotiating power? And also wouldn't key cabinet members as well as the president themselves be good to keep alive so you can execute them publicly as a show of force? I tell you these guys do NOT get coups man. They find Ron Swanson, give him some last words and then shoot him in the head. Then the movie ends with everyone next to the body like they're photographic a fish (I kinda like this shot tho, lol)
ANNOYANCES
They have a strange amount of jumpscares where they'll be like periods of quite and all of the sudden there'll be loud gunfire? And it won't really coincide with the plot - which is to say it's not relevant at that moment more so than at any other point in the movie. It's just bad and it scared me
tropes tropes and more tropes
stack up on me!
ah I'm shot but it's okay it's only a little bleeding
how stupid everything is
Anyway this movie was dumb and luckily you don't have to watch it because you read my review! Yayyyyyyyy :)
- 59
- 76
Battlefield Earth (2000) is the infamous Scientology propaganda film commissioned by John Travolta. It is considered one of the worst moves ever made, but I'd never seen it before yesterday.
It is now one of my favourite films. 
Literally everthing about this movie is hillariously bad. The sheer incompetence is awe-inspiring and I didn't want it to end.
Story & Writing
In Battlefield Earth, a species of 10-foot tall aliens called Psychlos (seriously) run a mining colony on Earth after conquering the planet a thousand years ago after a war lasting just nine minutes. Humans are now reduced to stone-age tribes in irradiated wastelands, or slaves of alien masters.
I can't really say much more except it makes no sense. The Psychlos believe "man-animals" are too stupid to mine for gold, but they already employ humans as a labour force in their city. 
The film is filled with the most ham-fisted exposition I've ever heard. As an audience-member, can you understand what blackmail is? Yes? Too bad! We're going to tell you anyway in 90 additional seconds of dialogue!
The Acting
John Travolta stars the scheming Psychlo security chief named Terl (seriously), trying to earn a transfer off the planet. His nemesis is the human Johnny Goodboy (seriously), played by a wooden Barry Pepper, who must lead humans to freedom.
Travolta's (and everyone else's) performance is so far over the top, he can't see all the way down. He isn't chewing the scenery, he is engorging himself upon it. Hense my favourite line in any movie anywhere:
If you ever wanted to see John Travolta in dreadlocks and a codpiece shooting the legs off a cow, this is the film for you.
Even Forest Whitacker, who's acting talent is undeniable, is wasted with nothing to do except deliver terrible dialogue.
Cinematography
A "Dutch angle" is a filming technique where the camera is tilted off the horizon to portray a scene of uneasiness or tension.
Literally the entire film is shot in this way. It looks like the DP had a stroke.
Also, there are loads of corny slo-mo shots, an over-use of wipe transitions, and most scenes are shot with an ugly, sickly purple filter.
Pacing
Battlefield Earth is all over the place. Fast-paced action set pieces are inter-cut with corny slo-mo. Thematically important scenes are not allowed to breathe, but are immediately followed by more exposition or John Travolta overacting.
Special Effects
Honestly, for 2000, the special effects aren't half bad. It all looks ugly as sin, of course. But I think this was a deliberate choice rather than technical negligence.
Summary
This film is worse than I ever thought possible and lives up to its reputation. But it's so bad, it became a joy to watch. I found myself laughing many times at the sheer absurd awfulness of this movie.
If you haven't seen Battlefield Earth, I thoroughly recommend it. I love this movie.
Mavis Enthusiast 
suddenly swims differently
- 3
- 17
The First Gay Space on the Internet
It was called soc.motss, and it anticipated how we use social networks today
I mostly looked to see what kind of news group this was and discovered the NATURAL BEAR CLASSIFICATION SYSTEM that gays used years ago.... Or now.
The guy who started SOC.MOTSS looks the coomer part, pictured here:
Steve Dyer, founder of soc.motss.
Chuds were on the attack from the earliest days:
Here's the Slate article's part introducing the BEAR CODES of gays in the late 80's.
Some of that nerdiness spread beyond motss. The geeky urge to classify resulted in the Bear Code (officially, the Natural Bears Classification System), invented by Bob Donahue and Jeff Stoner in 1989 as an “incredibly-scientific system to describe bears and bear-like men.” Santa Claus' classification, for instance, was “B8 d++ f? w++ k–?,” describing him as a big round (w++) daddy bear (d++) with a very bushy beard (B8) whom people guess to be averagely furry (f?) and not kinky at all (k–?).
This format inspired the later Geek Code, which was ubiquitous in Unix profiles and email sigs in the 1990s—except instead of codes for weight and beard, the Geek Code offered opinions of Linux (l+++++ if you were Linux author Linus Torvalds) and Star Trek (t— if you hated Star Trek). The origins of the Geek Code in the Bear Code were quickly forgotten.
I can't copy paste this long mess of scientific gay autism except there's some fun stuff in here like Wilford Brimley's rating!
NBCS (...or Bear codes... or those darned abbreviations :)
4/26/91 - post date
by HASH BROWNS
alt.s*x.motss (members of the same s*x)
Source link: https://groups.google.com/g/alt.s*x.motss/c/x6POznoEu9o/m/KukmNkFP_swJ
- Patsy : animal abuse
- 39
- 56
Weed makes me paranoid/anxious so I don't consume BUT….
Weed is legal in IL and two summers ago @Takoyucki visited me. He liked weed so I ofc went to the dispensary near me and picked up some gummies etc so we could partake.
We went to the field museum (I was high af, pretty inexperienced with marijuana) and then to the taste of Chicago. The Taste of Chicago had really tight security and literally this security guard woman took me aside and was like “WE DON'T ALLOW DRUGS IN HERE”. I didn't have any on me (had just had edibles earlier in the day) but had no idea how the frick she knew I was high. Like….amazing call lady. I wasn't even giggling.
Police tells counter-protestor to stop being openly 
, release an apology still telling counter-protestors to stop being openly 
- 41
- 88
I’m sorry? What? @metpoliceuk
— Kosher🎗🧡 (@KosherCockney) April 19, 2024
You are gaslighting Jews, telling us if we report on the prejudice your force holds against that we are the ones “making a further dent”
The guy was told if he stayed there he’d be arrested, when asked why, your officer basically said because… https://t.co/pTLc5hVU2U
Original post: https://rdrama.net/h/sandshit/post/262608/marseybongcoplaser-oi-you-got-a-loicense
Deleted apology:
New apology for the apology:
Various sneeding:
https://twitter.com/leekern13/status/1781348219840045351
https://twitter.com/claire88424030/status/1781370948869910645
https://twitter.com/nicolelampert/status/1781398231118717150
Rightoids making hay:
https://twitter.com/TRobinsonNewEra/status/1781412930677817779
https://twitter.com/LozzaFox/status/1781375302091849923
Actually important people (in Bong terms):
https://twitter.com/lucyallan/status/1781406960870416745
https://twitter.com/markjenkinsonmp/status/1781071114464092325
Reddit threads:
Post-apology:
Pre-apology:
while accepting your natural size? : PlusSize
- 17
- 23
I'm 5'3" and a size 24 in bottoms and a 20 in tops generally speaking. I have always been naturally fat to varying degrees but I suffered from a restrictive eating disorder for a few years when I was in my twenties which took a massive toll on my health at the time. I now totally accept the fact that I'm naturally fat and am not meant to have a lean body type.
However, I still want to eat nutritious things and exercise on a regular basis like for my cholesterol, blood pressure, stress levels, etc. I always struggle internally with this because no one will "believe" I live a healthy lifestyle because I am visibly fat. Everyone will assume I'm lying lol.
Ultimately I know it's my life and I'm the one who has to approve of my choices, not anyone else! Does anyone else struggle with these types of thoughts?
Btw, I wish to clarify: I'm not saying I would necessarily be upset if I were to lose weight, I'm just saying it's unlikely to happen due to the chronic conditions I have which cause obesity
Here is an example of size 24 jeans that she is being forced to wear due to chronic conditions:
300s ( 24-26) I've felt very crappy - sicker when I get illnesses unrelated to weight, struggling to walk ( lungs hurt), more exacerbated stomach issues, issues with medical tests (MRI/CT) machines, have to fly first class or suffer the entire flight, struggle to fit broadway show or restaurant seats, and struggle to do things I want to do like travel to a place that requires a lot of walking. I know my comfortable weight and sizes but that's totally unique for everyone. I've seen women in the mid 300s similar or higher weight than me very happy doing regular fitness classes and traveling to high walking areas. I also agree with your comment of staying away from restricting nothing good comes from that focus on doing things that make you feel good and all the other stuff will do what it's meant to do.
Yeah, figuring out that balance is hard. I was around 300, dropped to 190 during the pandemic due to an ED, and now in recovery am trying to find my sweet spot. Right now I'm 270 and it hurts. My knees hurt, even with low impact workouts. I get winded easily. My body feels like it's in its own way. Restriction is a no-go for me, so I'm trying to focus on consistent workouts and curbing some dietary things that don't feel triggering
And if anyone gives you shame, tell them it's a disability because people like them don't normalize spaces for all bodies. Or tell yourself if that's what it takes. They are disabling you, you are taking your power back.
Health At Every Size.
Yes, absolutely. I'm 5'1” and I weigh 330 lbs. i don't want to “diet” and my goal is not weight loss, but I do want to physically feel better.
I've accepted that people will always assume I live an “unhealthy” lifestyle because of my appearance and I'm okay with it. I try to keep more food around that's healthier than fast food but requires little effort to prepare so that it's the easier choice than a trip through the drive thru (one of my personal challenges in life). When I need groceries, I try to fit a physical trip to the store in instead of relying on Instacart so that I get a good walk.
Gotta keep those delivery apps afloat somehow.
Looking into this particular commenter's history sheds some insight into a day in the life of being healthy at every size.
Walking around the grocery store makes them break out in sweat
They're also addicted to popping biggol' cysts. 
- 6
- 25
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I've climbed mount warning, in female company, more times than I could count. The only dangers are those inherent in physical activity of that sort. The idea that nativist mumbo jumbo dictates public policy and access to public spaces in the 21st century is ridiculous.
Thanks whitey
/u/Actual_Ebb3881 is barely trying and generating so much seeth
So they're trying to justify closing Mt Warning because imaginary spirits will make people sick? Yet continue to sink piss and abuse their kids and partners at a much higher rate than the general population.. can't be too concerned with health. Cultural or religious considerations shouldn't have any weight at all in decisions that impact everyone
Inter generational trauma is a terrible thing. Your comment is unkind, small minded and demonstrates your lack of knowledge around these issues. Shame on you!!! SMH 🤦♂️
eagerly awaiting an angry reply to this one
[removed] They want all the benefits of western culture while maintaining their "heritage". To lazy to create written language or defend their Home but more than happy to stand around with their hand out, "Sovereignty was never ceded" is "We lost and don't want to blame ourselves" you don't get to cede what was taken you stupid fricks.
Just want a fair crack bro, like the one you were born into
removed guy's username is /u/DeepAnalRape 
/u/Actual_Ebb3881 with another banger 
It makes perfect sense with the deleted comment above 👆🏾 what happened? Cause you've gone from king/queen fighters to convict/slave no choice something something. What will be the plight of whitey next comment?
What are you on about blackey?, there is no deleted comment or are you still learning english?
you wanted to talk about centuries ago so i talked about a slice of White history, Europeans have been fighting kings and queens since before the Romans, the Roman empire was more more advanced than the Aboriginals were at any point in there 40 thousand year history.
Bit rich coming from the guy playing the violin for the plight of some Hut dwellers running around without shoes.
these dudes would make the most racist american hicks blush 
!strayans please educate us as to what these idiots are arguing about. i gather the rock is important to the abos and the chuds want to keep clambering on it? is there more to this?
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Now, as you may instantly notice, the amount of stereotypes is so high that if someone from here made an account like that theyd get bullied and spammed with 
Lets start our analysis
First the name:
Mx. Kestrel
Off to a good start, we have an unironic use of Mx. Lets keep going
Next, the pfp:
The flag in the background, the greasy hair, the unevenly shaved beard. All on a picture that is usually meant to look appealing. The stereotypes keep piling up
Next on: The BIO
Painfully queer.💀 White silence is white consent. ✊🏻✊🏽✊🏿 Lead Community Manager for @PokemonGoApp. 🎲 They/them. Opinions are my own.
Are we certain this is not a parody?
Lets see their recent posts next
Fat androgynous blob in emo dark clothing
Some angry pokechuds in the replies here, not much though.
Unsuprisingly, however, it appears the redesign was meant to accomodate xer and allow xim to self insert more easily. Because, say what you want, they/them surely nailed their look in game:
https://twitter.com/MxKestrel/status/1772787079488868796/photo/1
Click the post for a jumpscare of the guy next to xer. How do they manage to look like blatant bait while being completely unironic. Truth is truly stranger than fiction
And a recent feedback post. Suprisingly, not much pokechuds around here. Likely got them all blocked.
I've been reading and building notes, but I'd love to hear what folks think.
But you can find thousands of chuds seething abotu xem elsewhere, for example on the profile of a mexican neo nazi p-dophile Kaguya's Top Gal:
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It was here: https://youtube.com/@StreetsnapsNightlifeWalks4K
Content was basically a woman (with a real vagina and stuff) going around filming young women on nights out in the UK, they had hundreds of thousands of views and the comments were full of coomers. Previews still show up on Bing:
RIP to the Sexy Indian dudes jerking off to bong foids, I guess.
Post: https://rdrama.net/h/toomanyxchromosomes/post/262594/10inbongland-foids-dont-like-their-skimpy
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Never bet against the American consumer
— Jeremy 'adjusted for inflation' Horpedahl 📈 (@jmhorp) April 19, 2024
"Red Lobster eyes bankruptcy option after $11M in losses from endless shrimp"https://t.co/OFLx0ocT25
I'm not factchecking this, I choose to believe it 
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The Biden Admin has just officially abolished Title IX as we knew it. Now, sex = gender identity.
— Riley Gaines (@Riley_Gaines_) April 19, 2024
In a nutshell, the new rewrite means:
- men can take academic AND athletic scholarships from women
- men will have FULL access to bathrooms, locker rooms, etc
- men could be… pic.twitter.com/JfQVI9Yfph
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The IRS played in everybody’s face this year. You either owed or got a small amount back. Either way, most of us were all cheated.
— BLH (@_RareDefined) April 15, 2024
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"I care more about Eric and Dylan than I do about 90% of the people around me," a seventeen year-old girl known as "reb420angel" posts on Tumblr. She's talking about Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, the two teenage boys who ushered in our current era of American mass gun violence when they massacred thirteen people at Columbine High School in Colorado. It happened in 1999, the same year she was born.
Reb420angel is part of a controversial fandom community of women—some of whom describe themselves as "Columbiners"—who have connected with one another based on their shared interest in the details of the crime, and especially in Dylan and Eric. They range in age from their early teens to late twenties, and blog about the shooting from all over the world.
Dave Cullen, the author of Columbine, considered to be the definitive work on the subject, believes that Eric was likely sociopathic. Nevertheless, he was charming and well liked by many at Columbine. Cullen describes Eric as a brain, but a cool brain. He smoked, he drank, he dated. He got invited to parties. He got high. He worked his look hard: military chic hair - short and spiked with plenty of product - black shirts and baggy cargo pants. He blasted hardcore German industrial rock from his Honda. He broke the rules, tagged himself with the nickname Reb, but did his homework and earned himself As."
Whereas, Dylan, Cullen argues, was just a very lonely, depressed, and meek boy who actually wanted to do things like go to prom and college. Throughout the ten years Cullen spent writing and researching Columbine, he too found wellspring of sympathy for Dylan. In reviewing the boys' journals, Cullen writes:
Eric began his journal as a killer. He already knew where it would end. Every page pointed in the same direction. His purpose was not self-discovery but self-lionization. Dylan was just trying to grapple with existence. He had no idea where he was headed.
Columbiners have fashioned themselves as the true experts on the massacre (many deride Cullen as a competitor), pouring over the boys' journals, notebooks, and the infamous "basement tapes." Some are budding psychologists and criminologists, whose interest is primarily a forensic one—they see the shootings as a puzzle or mystery to be solved, complete with unanswered questions that verge on the conspiratorial. But others express an intense "connection" to Dylan and Eric, which range from a shared emotional experience of bullying, loneliness, and depression to a professed physical and romantic attraction. "I'm in love with a dead school shooter," posts Ada, a twenty-two year old, "what the heck did 2015 do to me."
On Tumblr, Ada and young women like her circulate photos, gifs, and drawings of Dylan and Eric, using nicknames and inside jokes, the way teenagers passing notes in class might have done before the advent of texting.
"I want to see that smile everyday," one girl writes, under an old school photo of Eric.
"Can you imagine how cute Dylan would have been on a date, like seriously I bet he would have tried really hard and got flowers and everything, the cutie," another one ponders.
They share gun pictures with captions like "ugh I want."
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Norm Macdonald - On the origins of 4/20 & Origins of Adolf Hitler
Transcript below:
So 4/20 was the birthday of Austrian-born German politician and the leader of the National Socialist German Workers Party.
a fella went by the name of Adolf Hitler…
…but this guy there's a picture of him!
…Adolf Hitler very compelling kind of a figure, odd-looking duck…
but there's something about his eyes hypnotic his...eyes are almost entirely black...
he was a decorated veteran of World War one and he joined the work — HOLD THE FORT!!
……
…he hated Jews.
I'm sick of these kind of characters!
…I think we should kill Hitler. Mee and you go suicide kill him!
Adam: the guy like died 50 years ago…
NORM: I didn't even know he was sick!
Adam: …he wasn't...well...no...that's fine.
Norm: I wish I could find a Hitler today and go kill him.
Never forget this gem. There's a full 30m version of this with 10/10 Norm in sweatpants on a ROLL.
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